Castro Valley Educational Foundation

Contact Information:

CVEF

PO Box 2693

Castro Valley, CA 94546

Ph:510-397-4095 or

510-537-3335 ext 1638

Tax ID# 94-2797523

The Castro Valley Educational Foundation is a 501(c)(3)corporation.  Donations may be tax deductible.  Please consult your tax advisor.

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The Castro Valley Educational Foundation is now a partner with the United Way of the East Bay. When you make your contribution be sure to designate CVEF.

The renewed emphasis on wellness by our schools is a welcome event. Clearly nutrition and physical activity are important components for our children to be able to grow and develop as we all want them too.

However, we should not forget their psychological development. In many ways, a child’s psychological development is a summation of the other components of wellness. In my practice as a child psychiatrist, I see the connection between the body and the mind on a daily basis. Physical health is strongly tied to mental and psychological health. 

Several factors affect them all: sleep, nutrition and physical exercise. 

What is less known is that emotional issues may first present as physical issues (consider the child who complains of stomach aches is later found to be extremely anxious) and that physical issues may first present as emotional issues (consider the child who reports feeling anxious and then short of breath who is in the first stages of an asthma flare).

Physical Development

Pediatricians look at children to determine if they are developing appropriately for their age by looking at growth charts. Is the child at the 50% percentile for height but the 75% percentile for weight? Are they staying on their own growth curve?  These are the standard measures for growth in children, and they are certainly important markers.

I like to take a little broader view to ask the child if they are happy with their body. Can their body do what they want it to do? Can they play the sports that they want or dance like they want? Are they happy with the way their body looks?

Distortions of body image are problematic for girls in particular, but also increasingly for boys. The extremes are children who are obese or who develop eating disorders, such as bulimia and anorexia.

The media in movies, television, and music continually bombard our children with images of the “ideal” body, even though most of us have little resemblance to that ideal of perfection. And it starts at a very early age. Many of us played with Barbie as children, but who has her bodily proportions or would even want to. In fact, as many physicians have noted, her physical dimensions are incompatible with life. Yet that is the image that we begin with.

The pressures on children build from there. In the teen years, the uncertainties of puberty and peer pressure can combine to further compound the problem. One key to resilience is to insure that the child has an accurate view of his or her body. The extremes are severe body distortion syndromes like bulimia and anorexia, but milder versions can color a child’s sense of himself or herself. If they have an accurate view of themselves, they are better prepared to resist the pressures.

Cognitive Development

As parents, we need to remember that each child develops at his/her own pace. We need to have expectations for them that are appropriate for their individual cognitive development. Grades are an easy measure, but not the only one.

 To this end, it’s not just about getting A’s. There are other valuable measures of development. Does the child excel in soccer or dancing? Does he or she have other activities that show appropriate maturity and growth? Having the responsibility of a job is another indicator. Do you feel that have the maturity and judgment for drivers ed and to ultimately drive a car or to look after younger sibling when parents are away? It’s easy to overlook babysitting and household chores, but these can be considered age-appropriate jobs and indicators of cognitive growth for children and teens. 

Emotional Development

“Have a nice day” is a common expression, but it isn’t always how children feel. We have bad days: a hard day at the office or a difficult boss. They do too. The scale is different perhaps. But if you think about it, dealing with difficult teachers or facing down a bully on the playground can be pretty stressful.

 So it might be better to think about how to handle days when happy does not describe how I feel. On those days, feeling stressed and down are appropriate. So are emotions other than happiness. Anger, depression and anxiety are normal reactions.

 Children need to know how to cope with difficult situations they will encounter. A child can be angry. In fact, a child should be angry in certain situations. The critical element is how they deal with the anger. We need to help them develop their resilience and to keep an eye on their risks.

 The mind-body connection can be most easily seen in the connection between emotions and physical health. If a child is not managing their feelings well, many physical ailments may develop or be exacerbated. Sleep, appetite, energy and concentration disturbances are common.  These are important clues that they need our assistance to get back in balance.

Concluding thoughts

Clearly, the mind and body interact in multiple ways. Our goal for our children is a healthy self concept. That image comes from success in multiple areas and is reinforced by acknowledgements from multiple people, including parents, teachers, and friends.

 Remember that you as the parent are, by far, the best observer of your child. A psychiatrist sees a child for a few hours, but parents have a lifetime of experience to draw on. You know what is normal for your child. The most important warning signs are sudden changes in their normal baselines and daily functioning. Look for changes in sleep, concentration, energy, or appetite. For example: a child who normally sleeps a lot has insomnia, an A student is having trouble at school, or a child who withdraws into his/her room and is ignoring friends. Changes from the normal may indicate a problem.

 If you do believe you need help for your child, there are many places to go. In elementary school, a child spends much of the day with one teacher, and that teacher can be an excellent second source of assessments of your child. A child’s pediatrician is another key player. As we have seen, mental and physical aspects interact and can mimic each other. The pediatrician can take care of or eliminate some potential physical problems and help us to focus on other issues.

 Finally, insure that you have an accurate and objective image of your child, both physically and mentally. Keep your expectations reasonable for your child. Give your child the room to be what he or she is. Not every child has to be a rocket scientist. They don’t all have to be perfect physical specimens or athletic stars. Just let them be the beautiful children we all love.